This box mentality has me stuck. You can be multi-racial, but as soon as you try to throw in another identity that doesn’t fit the profiles determined by your boxes (race, sexuality, gender, socioeconomic status, etc.), everyone is up in arms and calling you a phony. You’re not really Black if you enjoy alternative rock. You’re not really West Indian or Caribbean if you’re vegan. You’re not really into video games if you like shopping for highly feminine clothes. The list goes on, and I’d be lying if I said I didn’t perpetrate this myself.
At this point, in 2014, individuality is at an all time low. Besides everyone having the same Sharpie’d on eyebrows (look those eagle wings are not cute) and rocking the same Michael Kors bags, it’s hard to tell one from another. The people who do try to hold onto individuality and what truly makes them happy get laughed at. With the Internet, books, globalization, and the media, we are making fun of people who’ve ventured out of the comfort zones, outside of society’s boxes, to find something else that they like. Crazy isn’t it?
Being pro “like what you like as long as it doesn’t hurt anyone” is not easy. Moving into the mentality of looking for something that appeals to you more, even if it completely contradicts the stereotype, is difficult. But it is necessary. How do you expect yourself to be happy, to be you, if you can’t even like what you like?
I’m definitely not saying that if you like killing people to go for it, but if you’re into yoga but you’re Black, don’t let that hold you back. Veganism in the hood is not going to rip apart your identity. Perming your hair isn’t going to make you less of a “real” woman. Trust me, I’m a lot happier now listening to DMX and reading The New Yorker on my way to yoga classes with my Havana twists and full Nike outfits. Those might not all overlap or fit together nicely, but then again I’m (and neither are you!) a perfectly pressed package that you can square away on a shelf.
leslie nikole is a linguistics major who considers herself a reader before a writer. she hates capitalizing letters and has a vague sense of grammar.
June 17, 2014
Thank you!
June 18, 2014
Yes!
June 24, 2014
So true, “how do you expect yourself to be happy, to be you, if you can’t even like what you like?”