You know people say, “behind every good man is a good woman,” and they’re right. I’ve been standing behind a good man for the last 14 years and have walked with him through his most defining milestones. My man is handsome, intelligent, funny with a hint of sarcasm, persistent and a fantastic father and husband. I love him more today than I did when I said “I do”.

But here’s the thing, as much as I’ve stood behind him, he has also stood behind me. He’s spoken peace into situations that were burdensome and chaotic. He’s been patient with me when I advocated for something or someone that didn’t deserve my support. He has consistently checked me when I’ve been wrong; and he’s lead the parades to celebrate me and my accomplishments. He’s just always been there.

I’m a lot to handle. Innately, I’m a big picture thinker and can be tortured when having to reconcile my ideas with proper timing, people and resources. But then there also have been times when I have been so paralyzed by fear and feelings of inadequacy that I could barely breathe. Either way, he was there to share his thoughts about me which have always been affirming and greater than what I could see at the time.

No doubt about it, this “good man” that I stand behind is the wind beneath my wings. It’s because of him that I’m able to fly, sometimes even in the midst of fear, because he said I could. I’m not ashamed to say that I’m not always the strongest one in this marriage. Sometimes this “strong Black woman” is compelled to take several seats after being beat up a bit by the world and exhausted from my numerous, ongoing personal and professional responsibilities. It is in those times that I retreat to his arms, rest my head on his chest—and cry… and laugh… and listen. I listen to his memories of how I overcame, created, pushed, lead, persisted, empowered, and loved. After a kiss on the forehead and some dried tears, I rise feeling stronger. She’s back. The strong Black woman is back and ready once again to conquer the world.

I’m so grateful for those moments. I’m so grateful for my man, the man I enthusiastically stand behind; and the man who enthusiastically stands behind me.

Latasha