He was all up inside of me girl. But do you think I want to admit that?! God knows I’m only telling you because I know YOU WON’T tell anyone else. Because I know the first person to get their hands on this would tell the World Wide Web. Well maybe not the World Wide Web but they’d stand on the corner of Flatbush and Church Avenue and call me out for the fraud I really am because girl he was all, up, IN, me.

Inside my head, inside my moves, inside my pocketbook, inside my dreams and all up in my aspirations and you know that’s when it starts to get dangerous. You planning a future with someone all in your head naming your children and not just first names, but middle names too?! Practicing your signature with his last name instead of yours like you have some school girl crush?! You know I looked at that paper and called myself a fraud because why the hell did I think that it was okay even if it was just for a second to give up my name and take his?! Isn’t he going to take enough from me? Hasn’t he already taken enough from me?! Yet I just told you what he did to me.

I mean I’m a Bell Hooks quoting, Toni Morrison toting, Audre Lourde tell-’em-like-it-is FEMINIST. Now THAT I’d be proud for you to shout from the highest mountaintop because THAT right there I can OWN. I have no business in the kitchen every morning making breakfast for him and every night preparing a three-course meal. I damn sure ain’t picking up his dirty clothes and throwing them in the hamper so that I can wash them at the end of the week. And I must be a monkey’s uncle if I take the time every Sunday to iron his clothes for the ENTIRE week. You know he had the nerve to ask me if I could pack his clothes for him. I had every right to give that beautiful man a piece of my mind. But then again a mind is a precious thing to waste and I’m not going to go off giving people pieces of it just because they went and lost theirs.

I surely went off on a tangent but girl let me tell you something. I can BURN in the kitchen. I know how to make a meal so good I’ll have the most proper person sneaking to lick their fingers. You see he was in a rush this morning because I had an early meeting and he had to take our daughter to school after working on a presentation all night for the Senior VP. God bless that man I think he slept an hour tops. You see when I was in nursing school he ironed my uniform every single day no matter how tired he was because he knew it would make me smile, so I’m just paying him back. And about that suitcase he wants me to pack it’s for our trip to Venice. He surprised me with it for my birthday but he got called in to handle some big emergency at work and of course he waits until the night before to pack. Yaaaay me. (you can read my sarcasm right?)

I don’t want them to take away my feminist card for sharing some of the best cards in my hand and to pack up all my womanist literature because I want to take care of my man just like he takes care of me. Because girl you know, that I know, that we both know that I’m a feminist- but you see these girls out here today say you can’t cook, clean, wash, iron and be a feminist. But just between you and I girl – I’m determined to do both.

P.S. I make more money and work less hours than him anyway. HA! Way to chip at the glass ceiling right?
Feminism – 1 Society – 0

Of course he says it doesn’t matter- six figures is six figures. But my six figures is a little higher than his so maybe by the time it’s my daughter’s turn she won’t have to carry a feminist card that the women around her will be itching to take away the minute she decides to fulfill some traditional role and LOVE every minute of it.

Shanel Boyce
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