One morning I found myself unhappy and I could feel myself falling into depression. I disliked my job, where I was living, and where my life was headed overall. I decided at the beginning of the year to take a year off of school to work two jobs to save money and on my time off, travel. I am happiest when I am traveling. I feel most at home watching a sunrise or sunset away from my everyday life. So naturally when I would travel and come back “home” I was more upset and unhappy with my life. I started to really pray and meditate and ask for clarity and direction with where to go with my life. It was not long before I realized that I had spent my entire life living for others. Everything from the clothes I wore to deciding what my major would be in school was chosen with other people in mind. The expectations of my parents, grandparents, and family had completely ruled my world.

And then it hit me…

YOU CAN DO WHAT EVER YOU WANT TO DO!

DO IT!

When it is all said and done my life and my choices are between me and God. I could no longer live my life for other people. I grew up with so much pressure to go to school and of course pick a major that’s going to bring a lucrative career, get married, have babies and live my life with the same old routine. But what if that’s not what I what I want for myself? What if I don’t want to go to school right now? What if I want to travel and really pursue my DREAMS instead of the dreams that others made for me? At first, the idea of going against the grain really scared me but the idea of remaining complacent scared me even more. I decided to make some changes and the first was my location. I realized that living in the city I grew up in was really hindering my growth and the only way to change that is to pack up and move. Some people can’t grow where they grew up; much like a plant that outgrows its pot, they need to be uprooted and replanted in a much bigger garden where there is room for their roots to grow.

When I realized that I had complete control of my life I felt a huge weight lifted from my spirit. I felt like I belonged nowhere and everywhere. I saw that I could literally move anywhere in the world that I wanted. The sky was the limit. So I did it. I picked a date that I was going to move by no matter what. I started packing before I had a place to live or a job. Something in me told me to just pack and to PACK LIGHT. Only take what I need. There were people who of course thought I was nuts. How are you going to leave with no job? No place to live?

But after I started packing, everything started happening very fast.

The answer was very easy for me: I was determined to do whatever I had to do to make this move happen. The very moment that I began to trust myself is when everything came into place. I found an apartment that was absolutely perfect for me. I loved the location and I couldn’t beat the price. That little voice that told me to start packing also told me to jump at the opportunity to get this apartment — so I did. The next thing on my list was a job. I applied for a few jobs knowing that I wasn’t going to get them because I just didn’t feel it. I was starting to outwardly get discouraged but my heart knew that I would definitely find a job. I stopped worrying about it and in the mean time worked as much as I could to save as much money as possible. Two weeks later, I was packing for an interview and an eight hour trip the next morning. My heart told me to go once again, my heart told me to trust what I know and so I went. I have been in my new city for a week with the a job I absolutely LOVE and an apartment, loving every second of my life. It all seems so surreal to me, like I am living some sort of dream.

Take a leap of faith. The expectations and opinions that others have of you are simply not your business. YOU CANNOT SPEND YOUR WHOLE LIFE PLEASING OTHERS. Your life is your own, God’s gift to you. Trying to satisfy everyone else will only keep you unhappy. You please your maker and yourself and in doing so you will make others proud of you. Here I am in a new city, with a new job, and a new apartment. I can’t tell you how much my life has turned around.

I am happy, I’m full of joy and excitement because I am content with myself and the choices that I have made.

I hope you read this and realize that you too can truly do anything you want to do. If you’re unhappy, complacent, and full resentment CHANGE YOUR ENVIRONMENT. If you don’t like the situation you’re in CHANGE IT! It’s all up to you — you hold the key to your dreams.

Love and Light,
B