When I recently saw a tweet for a “Natural Hair Brunch” I couldn’t help but reply by tweeting, “I’ll be hosting a perm brunch soon.” What can I say? I’ve always had a little bit of asshole in me.

I’ve thought a lot about this post and it’s been building up inside me for quite some time. I’ve worried about the backlash, the comments and the readers who may disown because of my views. But, controversy is an element of good writing, or so I’ve heard.

I guess this is the part where I tell you the story of my hair. This is the part where I tell you about spending hours in the salon and getting perms since I was six. This is the part where I lament what those relaxers may have done to my hair and those times they burned the shit out of my scalp.

Alright, cool, glad that’s over.

I didn’t think much about the state of my hair until two years ago when I attended a conference and a clear divide existed between the women with natural hair and those without. The conference had zero to do with hair, but that didn’t stop some women from scoffing at me and taking me a bit less seriously. I shrugged it off and made the most of the conference, but the polarity amongst the group stuck with me.

I understand that the reasons why women wear their hair natural run the gamut, from wanting healthier hair to believing a head of natural curls reflects self-love. I take issue more so with the latter half of the spectrum, with the idea that you are somehow lesser than should you elect to get a relaxer or wear a weave or whatever else it is black women do with their hair. The natural hair community is a fierce and united one, hence why there are probably natural hair brunches. There are blogs and books and conferences, all centered around your hair’s state of affairs and the value system that comes along with it.

My particular value system when it comes to hair is the same value system I adopt regarding most things these days—live and let live. I certainly have a host of opinions about many things, but hair is not one of them. I think women with a head full of natural curls are beautiful. I think women with Caesar cuts are beautiful. I think women with 26-inch weaves are beautiful. I think women with teeny weeny afros are beautiful. And, yes, I think women with relaxers and a wrap are beautiful, too. Women are beautiful. Point, period, blank. This world already does enough to pit us against one another, so how ugly is it for us to only draw more of a line in the sand because of the products we do or don’t apply to our scalps.

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Tyece is the creator of Twenties Unscripted where she offers a sincere, sassy and sometimes smart-assy take on growing up. Follow her on Twitter @tyunscripted.